Movies to See Before You Die

I love movies. Here are my favorites in no particular order.

Once
Napolean Dynamite
Secrets and Lies
Godfather I
Godfather II
Rachel Getting Married
The Perfect Murder
Insomnia
Scarface
The Birdcage
Howard's End
Persuasion
Vacation
Sense and Sensablility
Tell No One
Slumdog Millionare

Things that drive me crazy

I am not Valentino or Clinton and Stacy from "What Not To Wear". However, here is my partial list of clothing faux pas that drive me crazy. This list does not apply to home or the beach or swimming pools. Wear whatever you like at home. This is for public places like the grocery store, library, movie theater, anywhere you might bump into me. If I look at you then slowly narrow my eyes and pull a face .....you know what you did.

1. Croc (shoes?). Are they really shoes? Fluorescent plastic on your feet. I bet that smells nice. I think I just threw up a little, in my mouth. Try sandals.

2. Flip Flops. Flip Flops are a sign of the Apocalypse. I don't want to see your misshapen foot. And that appalling sound, gross feet, gross feet. The people I see wearing them have not washed their feet or trimmed their toenails in months. It's like the toenail trimming scene in "Dumb and Dumber". Again, sandals, hello?

3. Tennis shoes. As they name implies they are for athletic adventures, not for perusing the fresh produce isle at Giant Eagle. Yes, I know everyone wears them all the time. Does that make it ok? NO!

4. Riding around in the car with feet on the dash or out the window. Come on now. These people always have filthy feet that are usually some sort of greenish color on the bottom. If you come near my car with those things I may not be able to hold my silence. Not to mention what if you have an accident? You look like a nutter with your feet and legs flailing about all over the place. Also you could cut someone with those toenails.

5. Sweatpants. Oh honey, do you have the flu, recently had an operation? No? Then put some real pants on Susie. I wear sweatpants, AT HOME. Again, yes I know they are comfortable. So is peeing in a pool, would you do that? Don't answer.

6. Ugg boots. You look like you are standing in two five gallon buckets. Go ahead draaggg them across the floor, no need to pick your feet up when you walk. I like that sound, it's great. Clearly, those are worth the $300 price tag.

7. Pajama bottoms. Nothing says "I don't care bout nothin" like pajama bottoms at the Olive Garden. This seems to be some sort of teenager trend. I know I was a genius when I was a teenager, so clear thinking and stable. It used to be if one saw a person in public in their pajamas you kindly asked that person "Who can I call for you?" or "Which hospital did you come from?"

8. Exposed stomach. Whether you are built like a brick chicken house or Jaba the Hut, keep your .... stuff hidden. I know you are cool and edgy with your pierced belly button that got infected after someone who calls himself "Skinny Mike" gave you discount at the unlicensed tattoo parlour. Also cool, the chubby rebel who doesn't care what others think about their body type or the roll that just flopped over their waistband. Show us your hard earned self esteem in some other way. Buy a sassy handbag.

9. Mullets. You know who you are and what you have to do. Pour yourself a glass of courage and ask your hairstylist and/or Mother for help. They are there to help you let go of 1983. It's never too late.

These things are clearly a violation of the Rachel code, ok a misdemeanor at best in everyday life. However, if i see any of these crimes against humanity at the next wedding or funeral, you have been warned.

I've Loved You So Long

First of all Kristen Scott Thomas is the coolest. "I've Loved You So Long" is French drama about family, death and pain starring Kristen Scott Thomas. Her character Juliette comes to live with her younger sister after a 15 year absence. Where has she been? Watching this movie is like an onion peeling itself right before your eyes. You get a small taste of her story and then nothing. You want to know the whole story right now but the movie makes you wait for small bites. One of the most uncomfortable scenes in the movie is between Juliette and her now senile mother when they are reunited after Juliette's 15 year exile. That scene made me squirm in my chair. WEIRD FEELINGS!!

Kristen Scott Thomas never disappoints me. She always looks completely different in every character she inhabits but is still so familiar. She can be anyone. Well, anyone that's cool. I don't think she could play a nerd or poor. In this movie she looks old and full of grief in one scene and youthfully beautiful in another. Go see this movie. You get extra points for seeing a film in French. Everyone will think you are smart and sophisticated, just like Kristen Scott Thomas.

I only thought about Reece's Peanut Butter Cups 1 time during the movie.

Delta Farce

We rented Delta Farce over the weekend. Uhm......ok so here it is.... instead of watching this "movie" buy two lottery tickets and tell yourself some fart and/or poopy jokes. You are done.

Rachel Getting Married

Rachel Getting Married is a great movie. It stars Anne Hathaway as Kym, sister of the bride and a junkie with a tragic past. Kym comes home from rehab to attend her sister Rachel's wedding. I got the idea from the posters and previews of this movie that it would be sort of lightly dramatic and funny but then I noticed the name Jonathan Demme on the poster as director. That would be "Silence of the Lambs" Demme. OK? "The Princess Diaries" and "Silence of the Lambs". Maybe it's a musical?

While watching this movie I disappeared into this wedding and family completely. I lost all regard for my surroundings in the theater. For once I wasn't thinking about how much I wanted a Reece's cup or how much popcorn was left!! The way this movie is shot with some hand held camera scenes make you feel like you are in the action. Throughout the course of the wedding festivities the family pain and joy flow out of each character. There are several times in the movie where you are laughing along with a joke and then suddenly have tears welling up in your eyes. Let me warn you. Seeing this movie will make you think about your own family dynamic. Any resentment, jealousy or pain that lingers in your own memory will suddenly be front and center waiting for you to deal with it. So it is not your family you are watching but these people are SO familiar they could be yours.

There are two other great things about "Rachel Getting Married". The first is multiculturalism. The wedding is a beautiful blend of so many cultures and it is not done in a smug, elitist "look how liberal I am" fashion. The characters are simply allowed to enjoy and borrow from cultures that are not there own just because they want to. The second thing I enjoyed was the music. Instead of having a formal music score, the music is provided by wedding guests with instruments. The music parallels the ups and downs of the movie with happy dance music to sad strains of a single violin.

As I left the theater I could not help thinking of three favorite movies that remind me of "Rachel Getting Married" in very different ways. The music reminds me of "Once", the family dynamic reminds me of "Secrets and Lies" and finally the wedding reminds me of "Monsoon Wedding". I was exhausted but happy when I got home. This movie gave me a lot to think about.

Olive Garden, Celine Dion ,Vin Diesel

Last Friday night my husband and I went to dinner with another couple. As it was a Friday night we had to wait the usual 1 hour, it is Olive Garden after all. My husband was full of his usual remarks about the indignity of waiting 1 HOUR FOR THE OLIVE GARDEN of all places. It's hardly the French Laundry. Everything in my elitist snobby brain tells me not to like Olive Garden. There are hundreds if not thousands of Olive Gardens all over the country and they all are exactly alike. Same wine, same food, same decorations. Around homecomings and the prom the place is choked with teenagers having a "fancy" dinner without mom and dad. It's the Walmart of restaurants. People dine their in their slippers, pajama bottoms and/or the current defilement upon our society, "flip flops". I should hate the place. I want to hate the place. In theory it's one of my worst nightmares.

Here is the problem. It's lovely and good. They do everything right. The atmosphere is relaxing, the bathrooms are clean, the wait staff are exceedingly nice. I know the food is probably prepackaged and heated up but it's damn tasty. Even the thought of their salty bread sticks and cheese ravioli make my mouth water. It is honestly the best ravioli I have ever eaten. WOW. Did I just say that? It is true and I am not going to be embarrassed anymore. I love the Olive Garden and while I am confessing my sins, I also like Celine Dion and Vin Diesel. There I said it and I feel free. You like them too, don't you? Come on... you sing along when Celine is on the radio until someone else comes in the room and we all watched "Fast & Furious" hoping the Vin Diesel vintage car would beat all new zippy cars.

Don't worry I still like Bombay Sitar, Weezer and Emma Thompson.

Happy Go Lucky

"Happy Go Lucky" is the latest movie from director and writer Mike Leigh. I was looking forward to the doom, gloom and suffering that a Mike Leigh movie always gives me. A la "Vera Drake" or my favorite "Secrets and Lies". Boy was I surprised. This movie is about choosing to be happy. The main character is Poppy. She is primary school teacher that lives in London. Poppy goes along with her life while we watch. When her bike gets stolen she just laughs and decides she will take driving lessons. Her driving instructor is her exact opposite. He is grouchy, mean and just plain angry. The best parts of this movie are the interactions between Poppy and this instructor. These encounters are alway funny moments however, Poppy can see through his anger to other emotions.

"Happy Go Lucky" is a very funny movie. You will get a few good belly laughs when you see the Flamenco dance class scenes. This movie gives you more than funny. There are moments of unspoken sadness that come through on the actors faces and only for an instant. This movie also portrays Londoners as normal middle class people. Londoners in movies are either slick, perfect looking, rich people or Cockneys calling everyone Govna' and having a punch up. Poppy is always choosing happiness no matter what she is dealt. I hope it's catching.